My hair is gray, my beard is red...?

...and the hair on my package is white. Do I sound like a freak? What's going on?

My hair is gray, my beard is red...?

nah, you're not a freak. same concept as salt and pepper hair If you want to match, then color it. (can't help you on the nether regions, though, i'm sure theres a haircolor somewhere for "sensitive skin!"

My hair is gray, my beard is red...?

its either you are getting old or you dye your beard......

My hair is gray, my beard is red...?

consult a dermatologist.